do u know the muffin man?

2007-09-23T13:25:00.000+08:00

i have moved! to http://charmainesparkle.blogspot.com!

seeya!

woRms in the sun

2007-09-18T18:07:00.000+08:00

today i witnessed a very tragic event... i saw a worm being attacked by ants. i mean an earthworm. its very gross! it was squirming on the concrete floor and thats why i noticed it... and after that i realised beside was an earthworm already superly attacked by alot alot alot of ants... and it was still moving!!! and this earthworm that first caught my attention was almost jumping about... and if you know me well enough u'll know how much i hate worms... i like SUPER hate worms u know cuz i find them very very very scary and unnerving... and i felt really bad that i cldnt save the worm... cuz usually when i see snails i save them , but that's cuz i can pick them up.. i tried saving slugs once (check out my 2006 entries) but to no avail... cuz they cant quite be picked up... but EARTHWORMS! i cant take it their too scary... and so i poured my water on the earthworm... and i juz prolonged its misery.. at least the ants ran away... but ...... sigh. and i left feeling utterly disgusted and totally evil... because i didnt do anything to save it and it was sure to die.

2007-09-16T13:18:00.001+08:00

no one knows how much i love reading love poems written by women! how they express longing and yearning and how they appeal so much to the senses ... i like how they almost brink on insanity, insecurity and faithlessness... the most common state a woman is in when she's in love. hail women poets!

On such a night as this
When no moon lights your way to me,
I wake, my passion blazing,
My breast a fire raging, exploding flame
While within me my heart chars.

The Gods of heaven are irrational.
So I may die and never meet you,
whom I love so much.

When evening comes
sorrow overwhelms my mind.
I see his phantom
that speaks the words
he used to say.

寂寞深闺，
柔肠一寸愁千缕。
惜春春去，
几点催花雨。
倚遍栏干，
只是无情绪！
人何处？
连天衰草，
望断归来路。

me and the unquoted poems.

2007-09-16T12:34:00.000+08:00

Though I go to you
ceaselessly along dream paths,
the sum of those trysts
is less than a single glimpse
granted in the waking world.

i dont love you!

2007-09-15T01:11:00.000+08:00

i accidentally read a friend's sms and saw "love you too" and it dawned upon me that that kind of state within a relationship is precisely what i cant come to terms with. there's so much helplessness and vulnerability in that... yet at the same time so much commitment, so much sincerity and truth.... its painful!

i dont mean im afraid of it. its juz painful to think about... and almost disgusting. and as i walked towards the car... with my new bag (how artsy!!!) my colourful shoes... my trumpet and the NUSSO banner... it was drizzling and the entire moment seemed so epiphanic.. like OH YES.

and i realised i say "i love you, coalie" or "i love you, mum" or "i love you, dad" but i cant say "i love you." *stare stare lovingly* NO I TOTALLY CAN'T ... when it comes to bgr... i go as far as to say

"I LOVE HIM!!!!!!"

or worse

"I LOVE HIM TOTALLY I WANT TO MARRY HIM WHY WONT HE LOVE ME!!! I HOPE HE LOVES ME TOO!"

but no "i love you."
its too disgusting! i cant take it!!!!! grrr!!!!!!!! *shudder*

and then i suddenly realised this is juz how im going to be forever. so i decided to smile to the rain because i thought it'd make a nice picture... right? the girl in the rain/drizzle... very artsy... hoho... like v xiao sa... wow great!

hahahahaha and then that's all for today.

mooDiness

2007-09-08T22:54:00.000+08:00

once in a while my mood plunges and nothing seems to be able to make me feel better, even chocolate! my productivity rate goes down to an all-time low... and i seem to have too much inertia to do anything... whatever i do is unproductive.

then perhaps i go online to search for random pictures... of things i'd like to see. today i found a very nice picture of a japanese woman... found on a dead japanese soldier in WWII..

after reading coetzee last sem and thinking about historical guilt... how it is to live as a singaporean chinese and not to feel any inherent guilt ... how different it wld be if i were, say, german or japanese... or british, spanish... maybe im juz ignorant...

somehow whenever my mood is low... such things get to me... the kind of eternal universal suffering that man have gone through. that animals are going through... these are some things that tug at my heartstrings and make me feel all queasy...

because of how often i think of these things... i get agitated when i consider these issues with respect to my life and the pple arnd me...

gee emo entry!

Springtime in a Small Town

2007-09-08T15:58:00.000+08:00

MUST WATCH! i loved it totally.

how to land a plane

2007-09-07T15:09:00.000+08:00

(CNN) -- It's every air passenger's worst nightmare: "The pilot has had a heart attack. Does anyone know how to land a plane?" Here's how to be the hero of the hour.

Don't panic: You've been watching too many disaster movies. The good news is that nowadays most commercial aircraft can land themselves anyway -- and frequently do. "The majority of current day aircraft have an auto-land facility," said Carolyn Evans of the British Airline Pilots Association. "If for instance the captain of the aircraft was incapacitated most company procedures require that the co-pilot put the plane down in auto-land mode. Certainly in poor weather a lack of visibility would dictate that an auto-landing be performed." Don't expect to find a big red button though. "The auto-land system varies from plane to plane," says Evans.

The "Airplane" scenario: Okay, so that's the dull answer. But let's assume -- for the sake of spinning this out for a few more paragraphs -- that you've stumbled into your own spoof disaster movie. The crew of your airplane have been mysteriously stricken with food poisoning and only you -- a veteran navy pilot who hates flying and has an aversion to being called "Shirley" -- can bring the plane safely to earth. Your first move should be to scream in the ear of an air traffic controller via the pilot's headset in order to convey an appropriate sense of urgency. Hopefully somebody will be on hand who can talk you through the tricky stuff and clear everything out of the skies within 100 miles as you wobble nervously towards the runway. If there's no response, tune the radio to the emergency frequency -- 121.5 MHz -- and keep screaming.

Direction: Basic steering is done with the "yoke." This works like a steering wheel except with the added excitement of potentially tilting the plane into an unrecoverable nosedive. Try not to let this put you off as your hands shake nervously on the controls -- these things tend to be a little over-sensitive. Nudge it a few inches left or right to steer and push forward or pull back to dip or raise the nose, keeping it just below the horizon. The big red dial in the middle of the instrument panel is the altitude reading. Your job is to get that from 35,000 feet to zero without spilling a drop of the champagne that has presumably been flowing freely in first class to calm nerves since they heard they had a first-time flyer at the controls.

Speed: The airspeed dial is usually found on the top left of the instrument panel. From about 15 miles out from the runway you should be gradually slowing to begin your descent, first by pulling back on the throttle (the big handle to your right) and then by gently dipping the plane's flaps. With four miles to go you should have slowed to a leisurely 185 miles per hour. That's when you put the wheels down. Look for a lever with a suitable symbol. Continue descending at about 700 feet per minute, cutting the plane's speed to around 135 mph. We're assuming you're coming down on dry land. Don't bother with the wheels if you're ditching in the sea. Better to belly-flop.

The final touches: Once the runway is in sight it's simply a matter of lining up the plane and keeping the wings straight. Don't let the nose drop lower than six inches below the horizon and pull it up a few feet before you touch down for maximum smoothness. Hopefully the brakes will kick in automatically once you're back on terra firma -- leaving you time to wipe the sweat from your brow and perhaps share a life-affirming hug with a grateful air stewardess before you are borne aloft from the plane by your fellow passengers.

2007-09-06T02:27:00.001+08:00

i did my tutorials for tomorrow and i became a slacker, watched "five centimetres per second" on crunchyroll and now have tears in my eyes! its so touching n romantic!!!!! ahhh im so sad!!!!!! this is the kind of melodrama that we always look for... and that sweet tragedy... that makes things seem perfect!! how emo... but its true!!!! ohmy i love it totally

i mean the anime. ok time for more work

goodbyes

2007-09-03T00:56:00.000+08:00

it was weird when mr zha left... like a chapter in my life so nicely closed and that's the end i'll ever see of it. im amazed im so calm, because i mean, mr zha is THE taiwan boy! hahahah...

then i sent shawn off... and that was weirder... i've known him since i was sec2. and altho we didnt superly keep in touch but once in a while he'd call me up juz to chat... and i rem our date at swenson's at whitesands... it seemed so long ago.. and we've changed so much.. and that makes everything weirder.

i seem to remember super alot of things suddenly, like suddenly im juz becoming emo... like how we used to meet at nanyang or chinese high bus stop... or elsewhere... n the concert we watched together and that walk along the bridge outside esplanade (what's it called again?)... and it really all juz seems so far away.

its nothing special that time seems to fly.

i cant even seem to remember when i loved jaychou so much... when i loved glancing towards a certain window when the bus drove past a certain block...

i cant seem to remember!

and shawn has been just around... i dont know... i never really felt like part of his world cuz he's juz too much of a high-flyer most of the time... but he's juz very special... like i juz cant imagine it... i cant imagine everything!

i cant imagine how we used to talk on the phone.. how we knew stupid little secrets about each other... how we gave weird presents to each other... everything's just so faded now i cant even seem to remember when it happened.

does time really fly??? or am i juz aging too quickly??? it's so so so weird. somehow i remember how it was, but it seems like so long ago. like how sometimes i'd see him at coronation plaza. i think.

sigh time's making things difficult.

or easy.

i guess not remembering / remembering withouth any melancholy is a good thing.

like i remember how painful 2006 was for me in the beginning part of the year... and going back for band practices... and juz generally feeling weird. that's also when i lost alot of weight and looked nice in photographs (which i still use today. hoho.) i nearly changed my lifestyle entirely.

and then i remember slightly earlier... when things were happening... and ..... wait... they seem to b mixing w each other. i dont quite remember things individually anymore..

oh yes i do remember feeling very very very happy i could sing and dance all day. but that has never happened again. and i just remember being that way, but i cant quite reproduce that excitement, anticipation and infatuation in me.

and what has become of me now? juz emptiness with stupid memories i dont even think about anymore. and i know that i shouldn't b disillusioned... and i dont think i am..

really

its best when it could have been.

8 minutes ago

2007-08-29T22:58:00.000+08:00

8 minutes ago, i felt so weak that a boy could juz pat my head and ask, "are you alright?" and i'd say, "yes, I DO."

hahahahah... why? cuz everytime im tired and hungry im liddat... so vulnerable! hoho.

now im eating instant noodles.. i feel guilty about it already. =(

today went to meet mr zha... last time im seeing him until god knows when. so weird this time i feel qt melancholic... altho i already v long nv see him, and nv miss him already... we went to take neoprint (haha) and juz walk arnd.... he bought alot of clothes! amazing...

ok actually i nv love him so much anymore... but its juz a v good friend feeling tt i nv had prior to this... but its juz v speciall...

wow!

ok actually i not emo already. yay! instant noodles save the day!

sushi earrings!

2007-08-19T23:37:00.000+08:00

thanks to michelle today two pple said im v jap! woohoo

why? cuz i got sushi earrings! actually no,,, cuz i tie my hair in a messy way and i wore a tie and wow i get praised!

i shall attach e photos...

anw today was shawn's bdae celebration,,, and i think i was emo cuz i cant believe tt ive known him for so long and he's now 21 and he's flying off to america real soon.

ok apart frm that,,, ..... i tink miche is a great friend cuz she knows i love sushi earrings~! and she bought them for me when she was in hk..

anww... we met alot of japanese tourists in e zoo i love helping out at e zoo bec of that... they are my inspiration n motivation!

ome

2007-08-18T00:54:00.000+08:00

sometimes on a crowded bus i think some warped, ammoral thoughts and fear that someone in the crowded bus can actually hear what's being said in my head... and i have some internal dialogue with that mysterious mind-reader.. and it seems so plausible until i leave the crowded bus because this person may not have gotten down e bus... apart from that this person does not seem to really exist physically because i dont think of him/her as one of the pple on e bus.. i look around at all the normal looking faces.. no one seems to look like my mind-reader..

come to think of it... my mindreader only appears when im thinking bad thoughts so perhaps its really my inner voice / my conscience..

new sem new me

2007-08-17T19:18:00.000+08:00

so concludes one week of my life as a second-year student.

this week has been scrimp-and-save week, with the freeloading giam siap singaporean in me feeding off the fruits my parents bought and snacks from various welcome teas.. hoho. so i actually did not spend any money on food ... except on thursday... when i had coffee in e morning w chinsoon, lunch at munchie's w schauminn and dinner w pan, dilun and elise at nydc holland v...

ok other than that... its been an emo week... so many times i felt like i cld give my heart away because i was too hungry or too tired. so actually if u want me to love u juz make me starve and dont let me sleep.

and emo-ly, i tried to think of a kind of forbidden romance ... things that could have been... HOHO so romantic. mygawd. hahahahah

other than that, i've been diligently practising trumpet... i finally found motivation. and how? because got freshies so actually that brings us to the conclusion that pple can only strive to do better when they're not all alone... cuz when i was e only trumpeter i was complacent and lazy and unmotivated and juz generally quite sian... but now im finding more interest! like those days in jc. so, its a good thing cuz now cfa is like 2nd pgp... which is a good start for next sem when i dont have my pgp room anymore.

ok that's all for now.... meanwhile i shall get ready to go home... whee!

2007-08-13T19:23:00.000+08:00

Module Code : UPC2203
Module Title: How Technologies Work

Module Code : EN3223
Module Title: Nineteenth Century Literature & Culture

Module Code : UNL2201
Module Title: Space, Time And Matter

Module Code : CH2292A
Module Title: Understanding Modern China Through Film

Module Code : LAG3201
Module Title: German 3

YAY finally!

2007-08-11T03:32:00.001+08:00

the mtv of the song i mentioned on e tagboard!

2007-08-11T03:00:00.000+08:00

heh i v long nv think of jay chou already u know! but he's quite cute here. heh.

very late liao but i still not feeling tired... n super long nv watch anime,, the feeling is weird.. lately everything seems rather surreal, ... everything in my life seems so arbitrary and lacking in depth... i feel like im living in a movie... or some framed existence, like there's nothing much more to it. it feels really weirdd... mayb bec lately im not in love w myself anymore. (!!) charmaine the narcissist? eh tt word looks like its spelt wrong. heh dun care...

keep feeling tt got things not done... sighhhh v scared i forget sth. dunno what's wrong!

mayb sch starting then abit stressed. plus i havnt done anything i promised myself i'd do yet.

heh like what stuff leh? like prac piano and trumpet dailyy... walk my dogssss... sigh .

ok so much whining ... hahaha.

anyways, pan's theme for this sem is DEMURE.

i shall have a theme too (人云亦云) hahaha.. it is NERD!

i decided that i shall strive to b a loveless nerd to pull up my CAP! charmaine jiayou!

status: 4 modules!

2007-08-11T00:44:00.000+08:00

okay i got 4 modulesss...

Module Code : UPC2203
Module Title: How Technologies Work

Module Code : UNL2201
Module Title: Space, Time And Matter

Module Code : CH2292A
Module Title: Understanding Modern China Through Film

Module Code : LAG3201
Module Title: German 3

heh.. still need one more lehss... no lit module dis sem... ALL so dificult to bid for. try round 3 lor..

sigh i wanna watch the jaychou movie but i scared i wish i haf an exotic love...

heh...

cors is HELL!

2007-08-09T12:22:00.000+08:00

i hate cors! because cors hates me. i dont know what the school is doing to me ... what have i done wrong?!

after 2 sems of successful bidding is this what's going to happen to me????

what have i done wrong! why me?!

this is irritating. this sem is a sucky sem with all the boring modules and exam dates that clash.

i hate cors :(

hiatus

2007-08-06T23:18:00.000+08:00

ive been missing for the past few weeks!!!! what madness... anyways,,,

ive finally finished reading "One Man's Justice" by Akira Yoshimura. it's really quite brilliant... everyone should read it! although i admit i wasnt in the perfect frame while reading it... amidst jap craze doesnt mean most absorbent phase of my life... i think need the lit mood then can fully appreciate this novel... i think at any other time ... i'd probably cry reading it. heh actually its not so sad one... its juz qt haunting and unsettling... really not bad... bec u know lately i always feel like my heart is very big... heh like suddenly i can feel alot of different kinds of stuff... n sadness and suffering seems to get to me quite emotionally.. so i think normally, when im emo like that.. den i will feel qt affected by this book. having said this, i feel that i wasnt doing the book any justice!!!! one book's injustice. how sad. but its okay. i really liked it till the end. its so beautiful.

in other words, please read it!

dont borrow from me, my brother reading.

anyway, this is a book i bought at books warehouse sale... so about 4 plus bucks only.

recently i went popular warehouse sale... also bought a few books. among them got 3 chinese authors and 3 books regarding japan. all in english. all fiction (if idint rem wrongly)... heh so happy! im starting on christopher ross' mishima's sword. speaking of which i shld really read some of yukio mishima's works.... they sound good but im a noob so i hadnt heard of him before this.... =$ im ashamed

BIDDING has been HELL.

dunno why dis sem SO DIFFICULT... want to arrange timetable also difficult,,, cuz exams clash, lectures clash... and then want to get my freaking lit modules also not easyy... whole day get outbidded. what a stressful thing im so sad.

so now i tink im doing two lit mods tt i originally dint plan to do. and cannot do JS1101E also. SIANness. anyways,,,, juz read this:

Ishida and Abe returned to Ogu, where they remained until his death. During their love-making this time, Abe put the knife to the base of Ishida's penis, and said she would make sure he would never play around with another woman. Ishida laughed at this. Two nights into this bout of sex, Abe began choking Ishida, and he told her to continue, saying that this increased his pleasure. She had him do it to her as well. On the evening of the May 16, 1936, Abe used her obi sash to cut off Ishida's breathing during orgasm, and they both enjoyed it. They repeated this for two more hours. Once Abe stopped the strangulation, Ishida's face became distorted, and would not return to its normal appearance. Ishida took 30 tablets of a sedative called Calmotin to try to soothe his pain. According to Abe, as Ishida started to doze, he told her, "You'll put the cord around my neck and squeeze it again while I'm sleeping, won't you... If you start to strangle me, don't stop, because it is so painful afterward." Abe commented that she wondered if he had wanted her to kill him, but on reflection decided he must have been joking.[33]

About 2 a.m. on the morning of May 18, 1936, as Ishida was asleep, Abe wrapped her sash twice around his neck and strangled him to death. She later told police, "After I had killed Ishida I felt totally at ease, as though a heavy burden had been lifted from my shoulders, and I felt a sense of clarity." After laying with Ishida's body for a few hours, she next severed his genitalia with the kitchen knife, wrapped them in a magazine cover, and kept them until her arrest three days later.[9][34] With the blood, she wrote, Sada, Kichi Futari-kiri ("Sada, Kichi together") on Ishida's left thigh, and on a bed sheet. She then carved 定 ("Sada", the character for her name) into his left arm. After putting on Ishida's underwear, she left the inn at about 8 a.m., telling the staff not to disturb Ishida.[35] When asked why she had severed Ishida's genitalia, Abe replied, "Because I couldn't take his head or body with me. I wanted to take the part of him that brought back to me the most vivid memories."[36]

...

The story immediately became a national sensation, and the ensuing frenzy over her search was called "Abe Sada panic".[9] Police received reports of sightings of Abe from various cities, and one false sighting nearly caused a stampede in the Ginza, resulting in a large traffic jam.[26] In a reference to the recent failed coup in Tokyo, the Ni Ni-Roku Incident ("2-26" or "February 26"), the crime was satirically dubbed the "Go Ichi-Hachi" Incident ("5-18" or "May 18").[28]

On May 19, 1936, Abe went shopping and saw a movie. She stayed in an inn in Shinagawa on May 20, 1936, where she had a massage and drank three bottles of beer. She spent the day writing farewell letters to Omiya, a friend, and Ishida.[35]

At 4:00 in the afternoon, police detectives, suspicious of the alias under which Abe had registered, came to her room. "Don't be so formal," she told them, "You're looking for Sada Abe, right? Well that's me. I am Sada Abe." When the police were not convinced, she displayed Ishida's genitalia as proof.[38]

heh.. from wikipedia. how interesting...

announcement

2007-07-29T01:02:00.000+08:00

dear friends, sorry for not consulting you or letting you know beforehand...

but now my hair is as short as haruhi's.

i juz cut it yesterday.

today i bought hair wax so that i can look less toot.

and i bought hair dye because i want my hair purple.

i mean dark purple.

still abit extreme.

if i fail, dun laugh. hah.

ok bye!

warum sind deutsche lieder so lustig?

2007-07-25T01:50:00.000+08:00

Hallo, mein Schatz, ich liebe Dich,
Du bist die einzige für mich.
Die anderen find ich alle doof,
deswegen mach ich Dir den Hof

du bist so anders ganz speziell
ich merke sowas immer schnell
jetzt zieh dich aus und leg dich hin
weil ich so verliebt in Dich bin

gleich wird es dunkel, bald ist es Nacht
da ist ein Wort der Warnung angebracht:

Männer sind Schweine
traue ihnen nicht, mein Kind
sie wollen alle das eine,
weil Männer nunmal so sind

Ein Mann fühlt sich erst dann als Mann,
wenn er es Dir besorgen kann,
er lügt, dass sich die Balken biegen,
nur um Dich ins Bett zu kriegen

Und dann am nächsten Morgen
weiss er nicht einmal mehr wie du heisst
rücksichtslos und ungehemmt
Gefühle sind ihm völlig fremd

Für ihn ist Liebe gleich Samenverlust
Mädchen, sei Dir dessen stest bewusst:

Männer sind Schweine,
frage nicht nach Sonnenschein,
Ausnahmen gibts leider keine,
in jedem Mann steckt auch immer ein Schwein

Männer sind Säue,
glaube ihnen nicht ein Wort,
sie schwör'n Dir ewige Treue,
und dann am nächsten Morgen sind sie fort

Yeah Yeah Yeah

Männer - diese schrecklichen haarigen Biester
die einen antatschen müssen
Und dabei wollen sie alle nur dasselbe von einem Mädchen

Uuhuhuuhuhuh

Und falls Du doch den Fehler machst,
und Dir nen Ehemann anlachst,
mutiert Dein Rosenkavalier,
bald nach der Hochzeit auf zum Tier

Dort zeigt er dann sein wahres ich
ganz unrasiert und wiederlich
trinkt Bier, sieht fern und wird schnell fett
und rülpst und furzt im Ehebett

Dann hast Du King Kong zum Ehemann
drum sag ich Dir, denk bitte stets daran:

Männer sind Schweine,
traue ihnen nicht, mein Kind,
sie wollen alle nur das eine,
für wahre Liebe sind sie blind

Männer sind Ratten,
begegne ihnen nur mit List,
sie wollen alles begatten
was nicht bei drei auf den Bäumen ist

2007-07-25T00:56:00.000+08:00

anyways, i juz wanted to blog abt the theatre workshop

i think qt good u know! but i was super afraid of masks. i mean at first i thought.. whee masks are coolll... but then later when i put it on i hated it... cuzi think it sort of marks the death of your self and the emergence of the mask character, which is somewhat defined by the personality the mask evokes when u stare at it long enough. i hated it! amazing. mayb tmr will b better. heh...

OURAN!

2007-07-25T00:05:00.000+08:00

I FINISHED OURAN HIGH SCHOOL HOST CLUB LAST NIGHT!!!!

i love it! michelle (e germany trip michelle) asked me to watch.. she said die die also must watch and she's right! den i told michelle (the peihwa, ny, hc, smu michelle) and she and i got addicted together... and i always dao mel cuz i keep watching.. and she went to try out and now she's addicted! oh my what a dangerous drug!

please observe these pics! i think haruhi is very very pretty and cute! and tamaki is very cute and silly i love his stupidity! but i love kyouya best because kyouya wears specs and he's v evil and shuai. heh! my fav character is kyouya!

so i decided to trace the origins of my jap craze...

it started not because of kimura takuya or ouran high... i think . cuz gotdis period i was really interested in the japanese street scene... like all the lights... so i went online and non stop download pics of japanese skyline or sth at night... and all that... or juz busy japanese street kinda images...

den i loved initial D to bits... like super addiction! but because i went germany den cut off and saved my life. but i shall continue watching again soon.

heh den i came back frm germany and on e plane watched love and honour... the jap samurai film... some period drama kinda thing... and i loved takuya he's too cute to be true! even as a samurai w weird hair!

OH HOW CAN i forget.

my jap love started IN JAPAN!

i totally love the sea in japan. u know cuz i always liked e sea... in japan i think it really gives you that unconquerable, melancholic, unfathomable kinda sense of isolation.

I TOTALLY LOVE THAT!!!!!!!!

okay thats all for now. matric fair coming liaos!

2007-07-22T21:51:00.000+08:00

lately i very emo... i think i menopausing u know! juz now i practise piano until i want to chop my fingers off... i think learning the piano is the best and the worst thing ive ever done... maybe because im generally a lazy girl.. so in the end it really is all MY FAULT! =( anyways, ya i vvvv scared i dont want to take exam =( boohoo.

exciting wkend

2007-07-22T18:59:00.000+08:00

wowies i think ive not blogged for TEN THOUSAND YEARS!!! So i shall blog again..

although ALOT of things happened, i dont tink blogging abt it will b exciting!

anyways, ya friday nite had band concert... wow nanyang band is so cute! now still got band bear i LOVE IT .. i super love all the nanyang bears cuz so cute! the concert really v happening you know.. got bearbear hanging dere when they played abit of phantom... i seriously super love band music! but i qt lousypok... my high notes really getting worse lately! dunnO why what a saddies.

band concert met alot of juniors... now fertility rate really super duper high.. we got super alot of juniors! so exciting... and we took section pic.. i shall load when someone sends to me.. its crazy we took like 10 hours to pai dui to take section photo!

den SATURDAY got the zoo thing... the SPH conservation ambassador. actually i really haf no idea why i signed up cuz i no feeling for e zoo. i like all animals but den zoo abit .... i dunno. anyways, ok la cuz i can pretend to b like jeff corwin know alot of things. heh. den bec of the grading i studied like a mad woman and nv really sleep on friday nite. so sad la! what a waste i wish i didnt study so hard cuz got time during lunch one. madness.

and i was super tired walking arnd e zoo u know ...

den came back and got the germany trip pple gathering (insert note: michelle says charmaine is a jiu gui) (-_-!) anyways.. den we went to e beach u know so exciting excitement... SO LOVELY i LOVE THE SEA ... oh suddenly love japan cuz i love e sea... oh la merrr...

anyway den we juz relac... moses played guitar *swoooooooonnss* den they sing song... and we stare at stars... SO ROMANTIC OHMYGAWD

ya den later like abt 3 am we came back (miche says its FOUR AM) anw, den hor... DEN HOR.. we came back to sleep. heh juz liddat, quite anticlimax. actually is they play bridge and i concussed.

cuz really SUPER TIRED mygawd... moses also slept bec he always drink abit alr den v... high ...

dennnnnnnnnn morning some pple disappeared... and some pple watched TOKYO DRIFT.. *dang dang dang i wonder if u knowww*

okays.. thats all now miche v extra whole day stare at what i typing.. cuz she e last to leave. she says she's an assistant. what a rubbish. she supposed to go church but den realised tt she wear shorts and slippers v irreverent! lousy woman.

ok bye.

depression!!

2007-07-16T22:44:00.000+08:00

ive been thinking and thinking and i think im going to be a poor girl in the future! i will work my pigu off and still not be able to lead a nice comfy life.. and what can i do? i'll b stuck in a boring job that i cannot afford to lose.... and i wont marry any special man... i always wanna marry indian, marry china man, taiwanese man, japanese man... den in the end i'll just b single!! and struggling to keep my head above e water. boohoo! life doesnt seem like any fun =( i'm in for loads of disappointment.

heh juz whining abit.

i really did worry. sians.

anyway,

iw atched the girl who leapt thru time today! i loved it! what a nice movie. good good! worth my money. hehehe.

The Girl Who Leapt Through Time

2007-07-14T00:07:00.000+08:00

The Girl Who Leapt Through Time
Toki Wo Kakeru Shoujo

credits:
Director: Mamoru Hosoda
Producers: Mamoru Hosoda, Shinichiro Inoue, Jungo Maruta
Writers: Satoko Okudera, Yasutaka Tsutsui
Cast: Riisa Naka, Takuya Ishida, Mitsutaka Itakura, Sachie Hara
Japan 2006 98 mins 35mm Japanese w/E.S.

An unexpected delight and one of the most acclaimed anime features in recent years, THE GIRL WHO LEAPT THROUGH TIME is the first animated adaptation of a 1965 young adult novel that had been an instant sensation in Japan, spawning countless films and TV programs over the ensuing decades. Director Mamoru Hosoda updates the tale to present-day Tokyo, all while remaining true to the same enchanting story of a girl who learns to time-travel.

Makoto (the niece of the original heroine) is a vivacious—if klutzy—17-year old tomboy who spends her days playing catch after school with her guy pals Kosuke and Chiaki. Her carefree summer days are literally thrown for a loop when she discovers a mysterious ability to leap back through time. Her trivial temporal maneuvers—undoing little blunders or finding out exam questions in advance—soon lead to complicated wrinkles that have an inevitable impact on those around her. And when Chiaki confesses his love for her one day, she not only finds their delicate friendship triangle crumbling, but also that there are some things time can never change—or prevent.

Hosoda is a remarkable new talent who, together with a stellar creative team including art director Nizou Yamamoto (PRINCESS MONONOKE) and character designer Yoshiyuki Sadamoto (NEON GENESIS EVANGELION), has crafted a magical and surprisingly affecting film full of humor, warmth and the bittersweet pangs of first love. After soaring through this journey with Makoto, one will never experience each moment quite the same way.

—Taro Goto

from here

the revival

2007-07-13T11:39:00.000+08:00

hallo everyone im back!

u know why i havnt been blogging lately?? bec ive been busy like a mad woman! actually i got spend time at home and stuff... but tuesday afternoon got trumpet lesson, evening got nanyang alumni band prac... n wed got orchestra prac and thurs got nanyang band prac again... yea mann.. and i haf a small ulcer (heh too much choc) but its swollen although its small. what craziness so painful. so i may not kiss anyone now..

i juz walked my dogs n im listening to my JUKEBOX... i really miss all the band songs! i like the band feeling again... pls listen to them on my playlist!

anyways, later im going out shopping w my grandaunt and my auntie... and michelle teo my germany friend wants to come along cuz she needs to buy clothes urgently! what madness.

grrr yesterday was pangsehed by mel ... i will slap u!

and what else leh... lately i got a jap craze because i love JAP HISTORY! ohmygawd. so i tink i die die also bid for jap studies...

u know i super love asian things... im dying to take

HY2206
China's Imperial Past: History & Culture

for AY07/08 SEM1

and

HY2232
From Samurai to Sony: History of Japan

in AY07/08 SEM2

but i think i haf no free UEs to spare cuz of german... HOWHOWHOW *sobs*

so i dunno. heh.

i think arts modules are so super exciting i love them!

got

GEK1007
Chinese Heritage: History and Literature

in sem2 also... see what it says:

The module aims to provide a general understanding of traditional China by focusing on two important aspects of its civilization: history and literature. In the first half of the semester, students will be introduced to the major political, intellectual, and social developments in the various dynasties of imperial China. In the second half of the semester, the module calls attention to the major literary genres that dominated each historical period, from the pre-Qin era through the Tang dynasty. In so doing, we offer students an overview of what formed the cornerstone of the civilization of traditional China. (This module is taught in English.)

awwwww....

dis sem also got

GEK2022
Samurai, Geisha, Yakuza as Self or Other

which is described as:

This module challenges the foundation of human knowledge. Examining cultural icons from Japan's past and present we will unpack the assumptions, stereotypes, narrative strategies, and visualizing techniques of representing Japan. Students will probe one or more of Japan's three famous cultural icons - the samurai, the geisha, and/or the yakuza - as they appear in literature, visual and performance arts, and academic writings. By the end of the module students will not only have a richer understanding of the 'realities' behind such icons, but more significantly, they will be equipped to challenge stereotypes of Japan presented by journalism, popular culture, and the humanistic and social sciences. Ultimately such discovery will lead students to question their own knowledge of self and other. Students should refer to the module IVLE page for details of the selected icon(s) for the current semester.

all my interests!

sigh why i go take LPP... i learn GERMAN FOR WHAT?!?!?! hahahahahhaha

i miss band

2007-07-07T00:03:00.000+08:00

hey everyone

imgoing to the zoo tmr w miche actually v far and i quite sad suddenly by the thought of the travel.

today had a meeting and i took a cab cuz no time ... was w my mum before that... den it cost me 23 bucks! and i was sad.

and then tmr i must wake early so i must sleep soon

anyways, i LOVE MY CURRENT PLAYLIST

i really love band songs
my love for band songs started a while back bec i started missing tt feeling of playing in a band.. that nicey showy feeling.. cuz i tink in orchestra im always for effects :( in band i got nice melodies that really make things to exciting!!!!!!!

but of cos i still like where i am.. or else i wont b able to look back and think of how nice band music sounds like.. so warm n nice!

anw, bec of that i miss TOKYO KOSEI!!! :(:(:( and i haf uploaded loads of tokyo kosei onto my imeem. listen! i love this kinda pieces.. cuz v exciting!!!!!!!

2007-07-05T12:28:00.000+08:00

woohoo i added alot of emo songs onto the playlist. enjoy!

before and after

2007-07-03T14:51:00.000+08:00

Before the marriage

He: Yes. At last. You realize what is good for us. I've been waiting for
this moment my whole life.

She: Maybe we 're not the soul mates . I should walk away from your life
now.

He: NO! Don't even think about it.

She: Do you love me?

He: Of course!

She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: NO! Why you even asking?

She: Will you kiss me?

He: Yes!

She: Will you hit me?

He: No way! I'm not such kind of person!

She: Can I trust you?

Now after the marriage you can read it from bottom to the top.

2007-07-02T01:48:00.000+08:00

hallo everyone! hahahah im finally back from KL... as u can see frm my prev entry that i haf a new bag! ok i decided that i shall feature all my bags on this blog one day. when i finally manage to photograph ALL OF THEM!

anyways, i was juz being emo two entries ago.. hahahahahah but im ok liao.. cu zi think life is too fun to b emo.. actually, no. i think soemtimes emo v nice.

who looked at the moon today?? i stared at it for very long when i was on e train. its gorgeous. i hope my love saw it too!!!! we're all sleeping underneath the same big sky... and i know u're somewhere out there, my dear mr Right!

hahahah. ok bye!

best buys

2007-07-02T00:24:00.000+08:00

BEST BUY OF 2006

BEST BUY OF 2007

first runner-up...

HEHEH. my recent most proud buys of the year.

single and available

2007-06-28T00:31:00.000+08:00

heh decided to blog abit before i continue doing all the important things like packing up for my KL trip tmr and emailing some important documents out.

u know the whole world is getting attached - its not the first time i realising it... and i tell u, the peer pressure is very great!!! boohoo. i feel stressed juz by merely being single. and its nv going to get better because im 20 and slowly pple will start getting married and all that... and i will b, most sadly, LEFT ON THE SHELF!

in case i get complaints from pple that say, "its not that nobody likes u lor, u're juz too picky la"... let me please remind everyone that we have to discriminate!!! cannot be every tom, dick or harry i also will like right????? dear friends u haf to worry if that happens. that means charmaine's TOO DESPERATE.. and that u have to save me from my madness..

in any case, im equally mad right now.

sigh.. thinking about some pple whom ive liked before.. and how they're faring in the love field... and how i am so unfortunately OUT OF THE GAME. what game? The Game. but shanshan says im still IN The Game because im single. aiya heck. it doesnt quite matter from which way u look at it. im juz being whiney and bitter. heh.

actually im not very bitter. but there was a boy who could have been someone i would love for the next 3 years but its now over because i mean, what's 3 years and then PIANG no more?

ok i think that was slightly confusing. but never minDdddddd.

sometimes im juz SO hAPPILY independent and free!

seriously! there are so many exciting things in the world happening right now! and so many exciting things for me to do.

but i feel left behind in this RACE! boohoo. all that peer pressure. i think i shld juz make myself prettier to stop feeling left behind. heh heh...

okok enough for now! tschuss!

emo wenbie

2007-06-24T23:03:00.000+08:00

前尘往事成云烟消散在彼此眼前
就连说过了再见也看不见你有些哀怨
给我的一切你不过是在敷衍
你笑的越无邪我就会爱你爱得更狂野
总在刹那间有一些了解
说过的话不可能会实现
就在一转眼发现你的脸
已经陌生不会再像从前
我的世界开始下雪
冷得让我无法多爱一天
冷得连隐藏的遗憾都那么地明显
我和你吻别在无人的街
让风痴笑我不能拒绝
我和你吻别在狂乱的夜
我的心等著迎接伤悲
想要给你的思念就像风筝断了线
飞不进你的世界也温暖不了你的视线
我已经看见一出悲剧正上演
剧终没有喜悦我仍然躲在你的梦里面
总在刹那间有一些了解
说过的话不可能会实现
就在一转眼发现你的脸
已经陌生不会再像从前
我的世界开始下雪
冷得让我无法多爱一天
冷得连隐藏的遗憾都那么地明显
我和你吻别在无人的街
让风痴笑我不能拒绝
我和你吻别在狂乱的夜
我的心等著迎接伤悲
我和你吻别在无人的街
让风痴笑我不能拒绝
我和你吻别在狂乱的夜
我的心等著迎接伤悲

harrr charmaine so emo??? hahahahhahahah...

germany

2007-06-23T11:13:00.000+08:00

germany has been alot of beer...

alot of ice cream...

and alot of pizza...

alot of narcissism...

and alot of love!!!

sorry i havnt blogged in ages.... juz TOO LAZY... come back got alot of things to do.. unpack, go for band pracs etc... hopefully i will blog soon.. bye!

im coming home!

2007-06-13T15:04:00.000+08:00

HALLO everybody!! im coming back on 17th .... are u excited to see me????? i bought 1.5 kgs of gummis and 50dollars worth of rittersport.... UNGLAUBLICH!!!!

later i will haf a german test,,, so this post must b vvvv short!!!!

the day before yesterday a man kissed me on e cheek... a yugoslavian man! what a disgusting thing!!! he is like the age of george clooney i tink cuz his hair is like same colour. ahahhahaha SO OLD!!!! myGAWD..... cuz u know germans v friendly hor... den he talked to me at e bus stop so i juz talk abit... den later he got off e same stop as me... and asked me if i were free for coffee e next day... and den he gave me his number and i said sorry i no time.. den i no paper so he write on some piece of paper in his wallet i shall upload a pic of his number.. den i said aiya write on money la.. hahahah den he said 'Sie brauchen Geld?' which means u need money??? den i said har nono its a joke .. den he said in german that we can discuss tt over coffee... and i FAINTED n den he shook my hand and kissed my cheek

and i fasterly ran home... and locked e door.

PHEW.

hahahahahhahahaha so exciting.

germany is quite fun in this respect.

2007-05-25T16:23:00.000+08:00

hi ich bin in deutschland ! ahahhahah duh im in germany. anywayy.... im finally using e computer! today we woke up late.. like v layz la... dunno why! last nite we slept quite eearly lehhs.

anw, den we like RAN ALL THE WAy uphill again... grrr. n were early once again for class. =0)

im determined to watch MONSTER on crunchyroll cuz i always wanted to watch but i nv bought e dvd cuz too ex u know! ok so now good, since e series is complete on crunchyroll!

ok gtg byee°!

in GERMANY!!!!!

2007-05-23T13:49:00.001+08:00

hello everyone im in germany now!!!!!

please check out the kezboard.... it is arranged differentlz from the usual kezboard we use at home!! and there#s all the umlauts... üöäß so cute!"!!!! and got farnie szmbols!°°!

°_°

HEHE i got new cutesie faces now!

Ü

Ö

Ä

=ß

^_°

°-°

°-*

°_*

€=

all on the kezboard°! how cute. anzwaz,.,,,,,, i cannot upload photos.. WHZ______ wow whereäs the qn mark. oh here, ?

anw. za cuy dun haf internet at home la... the pcitures still in mz cam cuy no point putting onto laptop zet! hahaha##

todaz iam earlz for class thatäy whz im here!!!! Ü

at the comp lab.
#

im earlz in punktlich land°! i feel proud of mzself..#

haf to RUN LIKE MASD EVERZ SINGLE MORNING LIKE WQANT TO DIE U KNOW!

ok enough for now

tschüs!!!!

May 16, 2007

2007-05-16T23:19:00.000+08:00

The celestial energy is signaling a pleasant change for you today, dear Aquarius. Finally, the overpowering emotions surging from your relationships will subside. You are now beginning a phase of gestation, and may feel as if you were about to depart on a long trip, with all the time in the world to meditate on the events of the past few months...

i love initial D!

2007-05-16T03:35:00.000+08:00

its 3.35 am and i juz finished watching initial D first stage!!! woohoo!

spiderman3

2007-05-10T01:19:00.000+08:00

i forgot to say that we watched spiderman 3 and i thought it was quite nice. i didnt like spiderman2 cuz it was too much action i hate action but this one was better because more feelings and i like that. so i concluded that spiderman isnt so boring after all because previously i always didnt want to watch cuz i thought i'd b bored with all that action. although its true that in the middle i did get abit sleepy until john fed me chocolates and i woke up again and as usual i think i talked too loudly because john was really stupid he said the artist of marvel comics is a "drawer" which is really stupid because he said "oh i think that's the drawer of spiderman" and i was like "har! drawer?" and i did that opening the drawer action and we all laughed and i told miche who was on my left about it.. and i added e story about how my brother praised my mum last time saying tt "mum u're such a great rice cooker!". ok i'm in love with long sentences.

yanner's bdae 4

2007-05-09T23:04:00.000+08:00

please wonder why yanner is nv featured in any of these entries titled "yanner's bdae".

because we didnt celebrate with her! she was busy studying ... now's her study break altho she's spending it in singapore!

ok that's all. please be appalled by the crazy pictures we took.

yanner's bdae 3

2007-05-09T22:52:00.000+08:00

yanner's bdae 2

2007-05-09T22:23:00.000+08:00

yanner's bdae 1

2007-05-09T13:42:00.000+08:00

my slackyness of late!

2007-05-07T12:22:00.000+08:00

please guess what i've been doing lately!!!!!

i've been watching

INITIAL D

why??? cuz i dunno! i've been addicted to crunchyroll.com and i've been mugging initial D ever since!!!!!

i also started watching "he is my master" which is SO 色!! my goodiness. but its v FUNNY and the girls are v cute...

ok that's what i've been doing lately.

this feels like holidays have begun!!!!!!!!!

10 reasons!

2007-05-07T00:14:00.000+08:00

was spending my brain cells on these all day - if i were a guy, what will b 10 reasons for me to like me? and the 10 reasons for me to not like me?

10 reasons for me to like me if i were a guy

1. i wear a jade bangle and have crazy nail colours! which i will find quite special and wacky.
2. i am a nice girl! bec im really quite easygoing.
3. i am vegetarian. cuz i think i'd think its special.
4. i act cute. cuz i think if i were a guy this'd b quite cute in itself.
5. i major in literature. cuz erm i think quite special.
6. i love cars and boyish stuff like guitar n card tricks.
7. i am COMPASSIONATE. *sniggers*
8. i am happy.
9. i talk nonsense.
10. i am a semo.

10 reasons for me to dislike me if i were a guy

1. i am fat!
2. i have an empty brain.
3. my eyes are small.
4. i have lousy fashion sense.
5. my hair is messy.
6. i am an underachiever.
7. i am a pushover.
8. i am not semo enough.
9. i am always distracted.
10. i am superficial.

HOHOHO. please verify!

broadway beng returns!

2007-05-06T00:28:00.000+08:00

hahah today i watched "broadway beng returns" at the Drama Centre, which is at the new National Library. i saw some really cute stalls outside the library selling really cute stuff. maybe the next time we go bugis we should pop by and see those cute things these pple are selling.

who's "we" in the previous sentence? anyone la. hahahaha

actually i've been rather lazy lately... like today! i had a 4-hour nap. actually i dont know how long i slept because i didnt take note of the time i started sleeping... anyways, i feel like dreaming now! so mayb i shall go to sleep soon =P hahahahhaha...

good night everyone!

i love broadway beng!!!!

tired!

2007-05-04T22:23:00.000+08:00

decided to delete the prev entry since even i cannot view the pictures! what madness i wonder what happened to that entry.

anyways, mr zha left this afternoon! i didnt like wave goodbye in movies... juz drove him there and took e trolley for him to put his luggage and instrument.. cuzmy mum had errands to run... so i messaged him “查修齐。。。我会等你回来的！” like very melodramatic i love it!!! i wish i had the chance to 演 those taiwanese soap opera kinda parting scene! but cannot.. =( my creativity has gone to waste!

then went to fetch carlin my youngest brother for table tennis training...etcetcetc.

the past few days were qt eventful... got pan's bdae which made me go slightly mad cuz v stressed getting everything put together. hope she enjoyed herself =) although i left abit early.

then i spent e rest of e evening w yuhang, desmond, mel and mr zha... we walked along singapore river... n den proceeded to little india. i LOVE little india... and i love indian food.. although komala's isnt too nice.. not for now, cuz i used to like it.. but now i really do prefer north indian food.. =)

then i went back to pgp to get my car.. and 顺便 take some stuff from mr zha..the stuff he wanted to put in my house.. and we spent like 1 hr cleaning up his room! what a messy boy he is!

anyway, then thursday i went out w mr zha n mel... met arnd 4 pm... at bugis.. and ended up at city hall (suntec, marina square) .... then orchard (cine, heeren n taka).... then we went home... oh yes we took neoprint! v got those olden days sec sch/jc feeling~ sigh!

today... woke up abit late.... then sent mr zha to airport.. den became family chauffeur!!

hahaha. now im back. =)

ok enough for now. OHYES one para in chinese for mr zha!

你好！今晚的月亮很美丽。请你望着窗外。。。我们千里共婵娟！

wow 好浪漫！

so romantic! that's all! ONE　ＰＡＲＡＧＲＡＰＨ．ok enough bye!

PAN's bdae

2007-05-03T01:46:00.000+08:00

woo its done! i hope it didnt go too badly!!! not sure if there was enough pizza but if i have extra money i will get sth for u pan! i hope u liked it today, although quite a few screwups! =)

now's time to chilll...altho at this time u still not home! hahahahha. takecare ya dunno when i'll see u again but well.. can be arranged! byebye!

happy birthday pan

2007-05-01T22:30:00.000+08:00

jap graffiti!!!!

2007-05-01T03:01:00.000+08:00

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do check out the new songs i have on my playlist!!! JAPANESE GRAFFITI!!!! GOSH i miss those band days....................................................... esp jap graf 6!!!! the kaikiat SOLO... ohmygawd... i miss it! please everyone feel the love for band that i have...

all these songs bring back lovely memories of both nycb and hcjcsb days... =) and im feeling nostalgic!!! i really must faster go extract all these lovely band songs i downloaded last time from my portable hard drive!!! grrr!

hahahahha anyways, im embarking on a new bk, after killing myself with all my lit texts last week............. oh yes please listen to FIRSTＬＯＶＥ the band version! ... anyways, yes. im reading "buying a fishing rod for my grandfather" by gao xingjian. winner of the nobel prize for literature.

because all the band songs are played by tokyo kosei i suddenly want to marry a japanese man! and summore lately i got alot of love for jap streets etc.. wow! its a sign that i must marry a japanese samurai man! i rem the tokyo kosei man gave us tokyo kosei stickers! what a curedies!

OKｉ　ｈａｆ　ｔｏ　ｇｏ　ａｎｄ　ｒｅｓｔ　ｎｏｗ please listen to the trumpet in the band version of first love and feel loved and sexy!

my new favourite song!

2007-04-30T17:17:00.000+08:00

午夜无伴守灯下
春风对面吹
十七八岁未出嫁
见着少年家
果然标致面肉白
谁家人子弟
想要问伊惊歹势
哎呀心里弹琵琶

想要郎君做枉婿
意爱在心内
等待何时君来采
青春花富开
听见外面有人来
我开门该看觅
月亮笑阮□大呆
被风骗不知

autumn leaves

2007-04-27T23:11:00.000+08:00

i'm missing jurgen today. i wonder how big he's grown. and because im missing him quite badly, i decided i shld juz go back to spca during e hols to do saikang (literally) again. because i really miss jurgen. but he may not be there already. and even if he is, he shouldve forgotten me already. but never mind... that's really secondary...

but i miss jurgen alot today. =( because he's so sweet! n he loves to lick pple in e cutest ways possible. such a gentle darling! i love jurgen!!!! he used to get bullied because his brother and sister are so active and naughty. and when puddle came he decided to bully puddle cuz puddle's younger... but puddle's this cute naughty podgy puppy who's on the SPCA calendars for 2007 and he decided to learn frm jurgen's brother and sister instead. so he wasnt bullied by jurgen.

anyways... im feeling like an autumn leaf again... like it's time for departure and i dont want to stay.

the mystery of the dying cactus

2007-04-27T15:35:00.000+08:00

I FINALLY SOLVED THE MYSTERY OF THE DYING CACTUS.

i was wondering why the last time my cactus dried up and this time my cactus looks really weird and yellowish brown but its not drying up. and it looks diseased.

and i realised.

finally, today...

that its because i've been watering it green tea. which is acidic.

April 27, 2007

2007-04-27T01:36:00.000+08:00

The current astral configuration may make you doubt your deeper instincts when it comes to trying to understand the dynamics of a new partnership. You really want to believe in the best, to hope that this time everything is going to be perfect, and that you can fall in love happily ever after. But nothing is blemish free, especially as far as relationships are concerned. Be realistic.

Mel showed me e above pic. so nice right!!!!!!! ahhh i want it!!! i shall make it!

seals

2007-04-26T10:43:00.000+08:00

this is how baby seals look like... in case after seeing that gory picture u cant imagine how cute seals really are.

a jap moment

2007-04-26T10:15:00.000+08:00

hahah i shall name this a jap moment.. when im listening to jap music n its raining outside... on a wonderful morning! what a niceness!! =D=D and lately ive a little love for the japanese street images... i want to go japan again!!!!!!!!

stop the seal hunt

2007-04-26T00:18:00.000+08:00

"Every person who strikes a seal with a club or hakapik shall strike the seal on the forehead until its skull has been crushed"

"No person shall commence to skin or bleed a seal until the seal is dead"

"[A] seal is dead when it has a glassy-eyed, staring appearance and exhibits no blinking reflex when its eye is touch-ed while it is in a relaxed condition"

reverence for life

2007-04-25T22:17:00.000+08:00

"...wherever we find the love and sacrificial care of parents for offspring (for instance) we find this ethical power. Indeed any instance of creatures giving aid to one another reveals it...

"The first example was told me by someone from Scotland. It happened in a park where a flock of wild geese had settled to rest on a pond. On of the flock had been captured by a gardener, who had clipped its wings before releasing it. When the geese started to resume their flight, this one tried frantically, but it was no use. Thereupon, the entire flock settled back on the pond and waited, even though the urge to go on was strong within them. For several days they waited until the damaged feathers had grown sufficiently to permit the goose to fly. Meanwhile, the unethical gardener, having been converted by the ethical geese, gladly watched them as they finally rose together, and all resumed their long flight.

"My second example is from my hospital in Lambarene. I have the virtue of caring for all stray monkeys that come to our gate... Sometimes there will come to our monkey colony a wee baby monkey whose mother has been killed, leaving this orphaned infant. I must find one of the older monkeys to adopt and care for the baby. I never had any difficulty about it, except to decide which candidate shall be given the responsibility. Many a time it happens that the seemingly worst-tempered monkeys are the most insistent upon having this sudden burden of foster-parenthood given to them.

"My third example was given me by a friend in Hanover, who owned a small cafe. He would daily throw out crumbs for the sparrows in the neighbourhood. He noticed that one sparrow was injured, so that it had difficulty getting about. But he was interested to discover that the other sparrows, apparently by mutual agreement, would leave the crumbs which lay nearest to their crippled comrade, so that he could get his share, undisturbed.

"So much, then, for this question of the natural origin of the ethic of reverence for life... Quite simply, it has the courage to admit that it comes about through physiological make-up... God does not rest content with commanding ethics. He gives it to us in our very hearts."

- Albert Schweitzer

das alles ist Deutschland

2007-04-24T22:15:00.000+08:00

Deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch.

Natürlich hat ein Deutscher „Wetten Dass“ erfunden,
vielen Dank für die schönen Stunden.
Wir sind die freundlichsten Kunden auf dieser Welt,
wir sind bescheiden, wir haben Geld,
die Allerbesten in jedem Sport;
die Steuern hier - sind Weltrekord.
Bereisen Sie Deutschland
und bleiben Sie hier,
auf diese Art von Besuchern - warten wir.
Es kann jeder hier wohnen,
dem es gefällt,
wir sind das freundlichste Volk,
auf dieser Welt...

Deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch.

Nur eine Kleinigkeit ist hier verkehrt,
und zwar das Schumacher keinen Mercedes fährt.
(Mercedes fährt...)

[Refrain:]
Das alles ist Deutschland (ohh),
das alles sind wir (ohh),
das gibt es nirgendwo anders,
nur hier - nur hier.

Das alles ist Deutschland (ohh),
das sind alles wir,
wir leben und wir sterben hier.

Deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch, deutsch.

Es bilden sich viele was auf Deutschland ein,
und mancher findet es geil - ein Arschloch zu sein.
Es gibt manchen der sich gern’ über Kanaken beschwert
und zum Ficken jedes Jahr nach Thailand fährt.
Wir lieben unsere Autos mehr als unsere Frauen,
denn deutschen Autos können wir vertrauen.
Gott hat die Erde nur einmal geküsst,
genau an dieser Stelle wo jetzt Deutschland ist.
Wir sind überall die besten – natürlich auch im Bett,
und zu Hunden und Katzen,
besonders nett.

[Refrain]

Wir sind besonders gut im auf die Fresse hauen,
auch im Feuer legen - kann man uns vertrauen.
Wir stehen auf Ordnung und Sauberkeit,
wir sind jederzeit für ’nen Krieg bereit.
Schönen Gruß an die Welt seht es endlich ein,
wir können stolz auf Deutschland
(Deutschland, Deutschland...)

Schwein, Schwein, Schwein, Schwein, Schwein, Schwein.

[Refrain 2x]

German, German, German...

Of course a German invented "Wetten, dass"*
Many thanks for the enjoyable hours
We're the friendliest customers in this world
We're modest - we have money
The very best in any sport
The taxes here set a world record
Visit Germany and stay here
It's this kind of visitor we wait for
Anyone who likes it can live here
We're the friendliest people in this world

German, German...

Just one little thing is out of whack
And that is, Schumacher** doesn't drive a Mercedes

Refrain:
All that is Germany - all that is us
You won't find that anywhere else - only here only here
All that is Germany - all that is us
We live and die here

German, German...

Many people are arrogant about Germany
And some think it's cool to be an a--hole
There are some who like to complain about Kanaken [foreigners]
And travel to Thailand every year to f---
We love our cars more than our women
Because we can trust German cars
God kissed the earth just once
Right on the spot where Germany is now
We're the best everywhere - naturally also in bed
And we're especially nice to dogs and cats

All that is Germany...

We're really good at busting someone in the chops
We can also be relied on for starting fires
We like order and cleanliness
We're always ready for a war
Friendly greetings to the world, understand
We can be proud of Germany... SWINE!

Swine, swine...

All that is Germany...

April 24, 2007

2007-04-24T20:37:00.000+08:00

Your imagination is likely to be flying high today, Charmaine, and lots of wonderful images may be running through your mind. However, you might be a bit too busy to do anything about it right now. Write your ideas down before you lose them so that you can make use of them later. You're also feeling especially intuitive, and likely to sense whatever strong feelings the people around you are experiencing. Keep the white light around you to protect yourself.

Today's planetary energy may make you wish that you could permanently hide inside your shell. However, you may also have to speak to your loved one, who may be in your bad books right now. Rather than harboring hurt and resentment, it is far better to start saying something even if it's just to announce that you aren't happy. Improvement in your relationship will soon follow.

random

2007-04-24T19:29:00.000+08:00

oo sorry for that crazy china post! pls see the pooh bear he wears a china tshirt.. n pls see the M is for Mao... cuz it ink its really cute. these are juz a few of the things i found online lately.. cuz i tink my latest hobby is randomly searching for pictures online!

anw i juz had dinner w pan n we saw mr benz n mr big so we said hi and then we had dinner w them.. how fun.. oh then mr zha came by to pass me that thick thick bk ...

anyways, i juz took a 5 hr nap juz now before dinner so im vvvv jingshen n good mood now!!

and i had lunch w herr schauminn today! what an interesting boy!

im juz looking forward to the end of exams!!! yipeee.

ive been rather cranky lately cuz i tink its u know exam den v stressful yaa..

i havnt even blogged abt exquisite pain n phantom of e opera! what a failure!

2007-04-24T18:14:00.000+08:00

schokolade!

2007-04-21T23:44:00.000+08:00

Research indicates that chocolate may be effective at preventing persistent coughing. The ingredient theobromine was found to be almost one third more effective than codeine, the leading cough medicine.[26] The chocolate also appears to soothe and moisten the throat.

More recently, suggestion has been made that serotonin and other chemicals found in chocolate, most notably phenethylamine, can act as mild sexual stimulants. While there is no firm proof that chocolate is indeed an aphrodisiac, giving a gift of chocolate to one's sweetheart is a familiar courtship ritual.

- schauminn

April 21, 2007

2007-04-21T23:12:00.000+08:00

Emotionally, you should generally be feeling good, Charmaine, but for some reason, every time you try to set a plan into motion, you end up running into difficult snags that make it hard for you to proceed. The hardest part today will be getting things started. If you find that this is the case, switch gears and concentrate on finishing up old projects instead. Follow through on your promises of delivery.

People aren't going to know how you feel if you don't tell them. If you insist on remaining silent they can only guess - and they could be wrong. Today's celestial atmosphere encourages you to speak up in a warm and open manner. Tell the person who is special to you that you do care about them. Don't veil your emotions in vague and confusing language - sound certain.

that guy

2007-04-20T13:58:00.000+08:00

Oh tonight I'm feeling fine
I'm alone just wasting time
no Friday movie nights or romantic candlelights

I'm just having conversations
with the thoughts in my head
all I hear are angels crying
oh won't they just sing instead

It would be wrong for me to say

I don't need that guy by my side
I don't need that guy in my life
I don't want to talk it out
or have him hold me when I cry

I don't want to say he's my kind
I don't want to say that he's mine
I don't want to tell him
that I love him more than life
more than life, love him more than life

Honestly, this won't do
how is he doing?
I tell myself I'm feeling swell
but I know I'm such a fool
I'll just take it as a new beginning
but you know I don't feel that way
who will take all this pain away?

I know it's wrong for me to say

I don't need that guy by my side
I don't need that guy in my life
I don't want to talk it out
or have him hold me when I cry

I don't want to say he's my kind
I don't want to say that he's mine
I don't want to tell him
that I love him more than life
more than life, love him more than life

Talk about a sin
was the day I walked into the other side
I would run back in
I wouldn't waste no time

I know it's wrong for me to say

symphonie by silbermond

2007-04-19T18:37:00.000+08:00

Sag mir was ist bloß um uns geschehn
Du scheinst mir auf einmal völlig fremd zu sein
Warum geht´s mir nich mehr gut
Wenn ich in deinen Armen liege
Ist es egal geworden was mit uns passiert

Wo willst du hin ich kann dich kaum noch sehn
Unsre Eitelkeit stellt sich uns in den Weg
Haben wir zu viel versucht warum konnten wir´s nicht ahnen
Ich hab geglaubt wir könnten echt alles ertragen

Symphonie
Und jetzt wird es still um uns
Denn wir steh´n hier im Regen haben nicht´s mehr zu geben
Und es ist besser wenn du gehst
Denn es ist Zeit
Sich ein zu gestehn dass es nicht geht
Es gibt nichts mehr zu reden denn wenn es regnet
Ist es besser aufzugeben

Und es verdichtet sich die Stille über uns
Ich versteh nich ein wort mehr aus deinem Mund
Wollten wir nich alles wagen haben uns vielleicht verraten
Es wird nicht leicht sein das alles einzusehn

Symphonie
Und jetzt wird es still um uns
Denn wir steh´n hier im Regen haben nicht´s mehr zu geben
Und es ist besser wenn du gehst
Denn es ist Zeit
Sich ein zu gestehn dass es nicht geht
Es gibt nichts mehr zu reden denn wenn es regnet
Ist es besser aufzugeben

Irgendwo sind wir gescheitert
Und so wie´s ist so geht´s nich weiter
Das Ende ist schon lang geschrieben
Und das war unsre....

mammoth

2007-04-19T14:28:00.000+08:00

You may have been letting go some necessary chores around the house and yard for a while, Charmaine. Today you might decide to embark on a crusade to get all of the tasks done within the next few days. Energy combines with stamina and determination to enable you not only to start on this project, but also to complete it and finish it well. Family members could pitch in and assist you. Get going!

Today's astral configuration encourages you to make clear your feelings, even if you do find it difficult to talk about them sometimes, because they run so deep within you. At the moment your partner is confused by some of your behavior, especially when you seem to withdraw and keep fairly quiet. You just have to reassure them that this is not a personal snub, but the way you regenerate.

do mammoths still exist? they do! in my mouth! i have a mammoth ulcer =*
it's so painful ! and its caused by my gluttony cuz i ate loads of chocolate and durian and fried food over the wkend! congrats charmaine!

anw studying w pan and jen at BTC on tuesday was quite fun.. CUZ pan was asking jen when we were waiting for e bus, what she shld do abt a certain guy.. n jen was saying tt her advice is always "TWO POUNDS!"

and we stoned for a while and stared at each other.

and pan said "har? pounds? why pounds?"

she said "yup! two pounds! that's my advice!"

and i shrugged and smiled at pan, cuz i also didnt know what happened.

and we continued to stone for a while..

and we said "what pounds?"

jen said "you know, P-O-U-N-C-E .. pounce!"

(you know that word REALLY looks weird like this. sometimes when u stare at words they start to morph into weird looking shapes. either that or it is spelt wrong. i think its right)

and we were like "OH! POUNCE!"

pan said "i thought u meant we had to times 3! because pounds is three times e sing dollar!"

and the mystery was solved.

ok dont u find that really funnY?
i shall do work now bye!

i love mel

2007-04-18T19:57:00.000+08:00

mel was talking abt that viginia tech incident.. (i actually spelt "insident" and it looked wrong. ohmygawd!) n yea mel! i totally understand you... where's the love? haha but seriously i think compassion is what is lacking most of the time when things like these happen. but then again, of course, the culprit is, no matter how victimised he was, culpable for really cruel acts. so it really is a vicious cycle.

and i really do hope that pple will realise that its important to care for others, not out of fear of others doing something bad to you or of karma.. but just a general way to live. in this respect, we shld all be buddhists! mel v happy now right? =P

anw, i really hope my brother will b a good boy and study hard. sigh .. i know how it feels to b distracted, lose focus... but i think its vvv impt to make sure your standards dont fall too low, ie dont let too much distract you... i think the worst thing is not seeing a person fail.. but seeing a person who has so much to succeed fail. if u're reading this, please be a good boy and please know we really are very concerned =(

ok apart from that, i feel like suffocating thanks to barbados and lamming. hello lamming, you're quite a torture!

mel please go out with me some day, juz for a movie, for neoprints and shopping! and oh yes YONGMIN too! i think 3 of us make a great combi =) i really enjoy it =D

ok that's all for now.

i must continue to fry my brain with postcolonial nonsense ... *sizzle*

a barbados moment

2007-04-18T16:31:00.000+08:00

this is one of those moments when i feel an immense sense of meaninglessness in existence. and i shall name this a "barbados moment", because i'm reading in the castle of my skin by george lamming ... and ive been going in and out of sleep... and suddenly, i realise how everything's so pointless. and i start to wonder what can make it better really.. i mean what's the point in EVERYTHING??

so i started thinking... how now? nothing can make me feel better because now im questioning the meaning of everything that even exists.

and i think and think. and i wonder if i'm at home, will i feel better. and no.

i wonder if i'm watching tv will i feel better. and no.

if i had someone to talk to (or a boyfriend) will i feel better. no.

if i were as pretty as mel's papergirlshop girls. no.

nothing! and i continued to imagine although i'm supposed to be reading my book...

and i decided that, if i watched a movie and went shopping, i'd feel better.

ok then problem solved.

2007-04-17T16:50:00.001+08:00

April 17, 2007

2007-04-17T14:44:00.000+08:00

Some rather boring paperwork you may have been putting off could well need to be taken care of today. However, Charmaine, this is a positive development, as you might discover that certain benefits could come your way once this is handled. Other members of your household could decide to pitch in and help. Listen to what they have to say. Those around you are likely to be very insightful right now.

The current astral configuration gives you a chance to be more daring and enterprising when it comes to your love life. You won't get a foot in the door if you insist on hiding away and refusing to speak to the person you so deeply admire. Then you could regret your actions. Go ahead and be the darling, charming self you know you can be, even if you have to act.

gee whiz

2007-04-17T09:36:00.000+08:00

GEE thanks to that one entry my poor tagboard is covered! how lame. we'll ahve to wait three days till that entry disappears frm view. hahahahaha.

anyway, i love RAVEN too!!! and i think fiona xie is very hot.. so in conclusion, i think i'm very pretty and wonderful cuz i look like these pple. hahahahhah. ok enough enough byebye!

facerecognition

2007-04-17T09:19:00.000+08:00

i got rather interested in that thing on pan's blog.. u knwo the face recognition thing?? n i decided to go try it out while im filing my work.. n i put this really BIG FAT picture of my face... n i actually got quite nice celebrity lookalikes!

firstly, i got brenda song... whom i totally LOVE she's so cute!!!!!

so i'm very happy.

and i was scrolling n i got more of those chinese pple which is cool cuz im chinese duh..

pple like kelly hu (like.. WHO?!)

and guess what

JAY CHOU

i fainted instantaneously and nearly choked on my own tongue. i look like jay chou! like what the hell! hahahahhahaha.

it got abit funny... esp the funny black guy! he's the one on "whose line issit anyway" right? hahahahaha... so i decided to try my classic charmaine picture:

prettygirl

2007-04-16T22:30:00.000+08:00

i think some girls are JUST SO PRETTY LA!!!!!! how leh i think i shld b a boy instead!!! i'm influenced by mel.. i want to b a boy now!!! but mayb. i shall juz beautify myself ahahahhaha. anw i think miche is on her way there! pls look at the maddies blog here to check out her new hairstyle..

hahahahha anw how to! i dont even look like that.. i shall stick to looking like this :

im lovin me!

2007-04-15T23:56:00.000+08:00

i feel that i love myself alot today! so i decided to put alot of my pictures!

2007-04-15T20:40:00.000+08:00

hmmm in case u all think im going crazy n sad... i actually am! no lar.. im juz v melancholic lately.. i think its pre-exam stress... n ve been feeling v lost n disoriented.. iwonder why!

and i really really wish to go shopping. but if i go tmr, im eating into study time. i tink i'll go arnd noon... with my mum.. then go back to pgp in e late afternoon... i so dont want to go back u know! everytime im home i feel... like staying home. hahah.

anw... i shall try hot pink again tonite! oh okay blog again later when i got more things to say yea hahaha

when you wish upon a star

2007-04-15T02:31:00.000+08:00

When you wish upon a star
Makes no difference who you are
Anything your heart desires
Will come to you

If your heart is in your dream
No request is too extreme
When you wish upon a star
As dreamers do

Fate is kind
She brings to those who love
The sweet fulfillment of
Their secret longing

Like a bolt out of the blue
Fate steps in and sees you through
When you wish upon a star
Your dreams come true

How many times have I wished upon a star?
How many dreams have I placed my heart in?

Maybe it is not a just a fairytale
Perhaps it is not a lie I’ve been telling myself

I probably haven’t wished hard enough upon my star
I probably haven’t put my heart deep enough into my dreams
Fate is kind
She brings to those who love
The sweet fulfilment of their secret longing.

April 14, 2007

2007-04-14T22:40:00.000+08:00

The period ahead will be pushing you to develop some sort of artistic activity, Charmaine. You have the choice between photography, painting, or any other kind of creative activity. This will allow you to deal with some of the hang-ups in your life that are narrowing your horizons at the moment. If you aren't interested in art, you can always call up a friend and talk to him or her about your problems.

You may not feel like going out and partying, especially with the current astral configuration. In some ways, even though you may be happy with your current relationship, and even if you're not, it may benefit you to spend some time alone doing all the practical things that you haven't had a chance to get on with. It would also be helpful to reflect on what you want to happen in the future.

oh my i think im going crazy... so stressed lately i feel slightly insane. i need some excitement in my life ... maybe TV will help. having tt vvv trapped feeling ...so i decided to go shopping either tmr or on monday or both. =) hoping retail therapy and trip down to some more happening places will help this suffocating feeling. =)

i read some chinese poemish thing that mel took from some girl.. n for a moment i nearly cried! ahahaha. what a shocking. yea seriously like tears welled up in my eyes and u think what a craziness how can charmaine behave like a weakling!

yea even my german classmate said, "har but u alwayslook so happy!!" bec i said im really uber stressed out now..

for that reason, i've decided,,, after last week's SKYBLUE nails... i shallhave HOTPINK this wk =) if they last the weekend. hahahahah.

i dun just mean tt literally... i mean if i dun get sick of them too. hahahahaha...

in fact... im getting pink polish all over the keyboard right now. hahahah! what a loser.

oh gosh my nails are CMI... hahahaahhah okok remove remove!

maybe tmr night den do again..

what a BIMBO entry this is... and im writing like i think it matters! hahahahaha...

anyway, mr P is such a sweet talker!!! he keeps praising me i love it!!! hahahahahhaha he's very funny! i'm v happy got such a crazy friend who nonstop try to make girls happy...hahahahah what a lucky person i am to have such a friend to praise me! oh great job i keep repeating myself. actually i feel v giddy now cuz i keep staring at e screen

anw i put mr P cuz he asked me not to spoil his reputation hahahahahah

siGH ok i stop blogging now first.. i read those sad chinese lines again!

爱我别走

2007-04-14T03:13:00.000+08:00

我到了这个时候还是一样
夜里的寂寞容易叫人悲伤
我不敢想的太多
因为我一个人

迎面而来的月光拉长身影
漫无目的地走在冷冷的街
我没有你的消息
因为我在想你

爱我别走
如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

爱我别走
如果你说你不爱我
不要听见你真的说出口
再给我一点温柔

wow what a pretty song that i'm learning to play on the guitar now... cuz lately ive been listening to this song, and i even thought of playing it for pan on her bdae.. but its ok i shall not! cuz david has played it. and i cant sing it =( its too low!!! what lousiness. how romantic ..

bärenhunger!

2007-04-13T12:24:00.000+08:00

OH IM SO STARVING.... here's sth i took off pan's blog who took off marvin's blog who took off this website:

Aquarius: January 20 – February 18 Symbol: Water Bearer
You need people around you even though you can sometimes be rebellious. Intelligent and interested in progressive thought. You have a plethora of friends but have a tendency to not get too intimate with any one person.

Perfect match: Gemini, Libra
Almost perfect: Aries, Sagittarius
Opposites attract: Cancer, Virgo
Signs to learn from: Capricorn, Pisces
Not your destiny: Taurus, Scorpio

anyway, i'm immensely hungry! i've been working at this 600-700 word essay for about 2 days. i'm such a LOSER. and i walked to school today so i guess that explains my hunger... i could eat a TREE! i'm going to eat soon. hahaha.

ok but i have to get this done first!!! cuz i cant continue slacking u know. and im the poor soul who still has a lecture later. like what the-?! why now still got lecture. but why shld i complain so much when all week i didnt go for anything but german lectures and tutorials?? hahaha

oh i did pretty ok for my german tests!!! so i'm a happy girl. so studying one extra day does help! don't study the night before~! study the night before the night before. oh what a funny.

OK i think that's all for now because i'm not supposed to b typing in this window... im supposed to b typing in a word doc! and im supposed to go for lunch happily alone. =( actually i'm not sad at all. cuz i was telling corwinhuangjinzheng that i love this alone life because i feel that i'm a BIG GIRL now and this is all a part of being independent and grown-up. and it's been quite a while since i lunched alone..so this is a chance to revive the loner in me! yeaman!

okiE so i shall go now..

April 12, 2007

2007-04-12T13:19:00.000+08:00

Friends or other visitors might come to your door today, Charmaine. Expect the exchange of a lot of ideas, which spurs on your own innovative inclinations. A lot of information is likely to come to light, perhaps with regard to finance, investments, and other practical matters. In the meantime, you're likely to enjoy the company of your friends. Enjoy your day.

The current astral configuration makes you suddenly unsure of your real feelings for someone special. You may have been attempting not to notice how their attitude alternated from hot to cold for no apparent reason, and how you found this difficult to swallow. Perhaps it would be a good idea to discuss it with them and see if they are willing to provide you with a more reassuring response.

mystery theme for pan's 21st!

2007-04-12T01:20:00.000+08:00

verbal diarrhaeoadfadjfapoera

2007-04-11T23:10:00.000+08:00

i cant freaking spell diarrheadafoadehfew if u know word im trying to spell. cant believe ive known that word almost all my life, since the first time i knew about LAO SAI and i still cant spell it. so this entry shld b renamed as verbal laosai. hahahah what a funny i am.

actually i got nothing to say, but i'm really so happy that tonight i have a few minutes of freedom u know!!

anyway, i downloaded THE TYPING OF THE DEAD its a VERY FUNNY GAME PLEEASE EVERYONE GO PLAY IT. you know that house of the dead or whatever arcade game, this is the typing version, introed to me by geckwoon my loyal neighbour. its v funny cuz u type to kill e monster. and its really FUN!

and i also downloaded need for speed most wanted demo version so i get to drive cars which is really fun too.

yay. i love all these stuff to brighten up my day. of cos i got prac piano also la! hahahahhaah. i dont knwo where i find all the time to do such things when i haf assignemnts due. mayb its cuz I DONT GO FOR LESSONS ANYMORE. because not much to go for anyways. tomorrow got la. must go one... sigh.

anw i need to improve my lousypok english. im so bored laaaa ithink this is the worst time of my semester cuz im just feeling so SIAN which means no mood for anything = ( boohoo. and my little world is getting boring..

ok this entry v stupid may i blog a more intellectual one later so pple will continue to think tt im clever.

thinking

2007-04-11T22:29:00.000+08:00

took a jolly nap juz now and in between i received a few phone calls and felt really dreamy until everything seemed rather dreamlike and surreal and i didnt know what was real and what wasn't, and then nothing seemed to matter anymore because it would all go away just like a dream and nothing will be left because it is all just one big illusion that i created in my little hopeful brain and there will be no regrets either way because nothing's going to happen either way but then again, am i being rational or am i still dreaming? maybe something will happen after all, maybe i will regret not doing some things or doing some things and how am i to live with the regret because it's not the first time such a thing has happened? how confused can a girl get when something like this is happening but she's so busy with everything else but she wants to get things settled - does she really want to - because uncertainty is so unbearable but is certainty better or for the better and who really knows? why am i the one doing this thinking when it shouldnt be my job or should i not be thinking at all, you can help me do the thinking and you can be the one acting but where are you? maybe contentment is the key and the best way out of such a situation because it is comfortable the way it is and i really like it the way it is and im so afraid of pulling it in the wrong direction and once again why am i the only one doing the thinking? can you think too?

April 11, 2007

2007-04-11T10:26:00.000+08:00

A lot of stimulating conversation could come your way today, most of it via telephone. Success through writing or speaking is strongly indicated at this time, Charmaine. Communication with those close to you should be warm, loving, and full of understanding. Expect relationships of all kinds to flourish at this time. Classes and lectures could provide stimulating not only as social contact, but also as useful information. Enjoy your day.

The present planetary alignment could leave you feeling as though something quite major is about to happen. Yet it only will do so if you make the effort. You know that there is an issue that now needs to be sorted out as far as your love life is concerned, in order for you to be able to move on and move into new relationships. Don't avoid discussing what you feel with the person closest to you. Get to it!

charmainesparkle

2007-04-11T09:58:00.001+08:00

meow!

2007-04-11T08:49:00.000+08:00

cheerios

2007-04-11T02:57:00.000+08:00

am rather cheered up now.. because i juz had pan n mr zha to talk nonsense n cheer me up! woo pple are yelling again, they must b watching some soccer match. amazing how 2 bars of chocolate (german chocolate, oder Schokolade) cant do the job as well as friends. mr zha is a hardworking boy! he's studying for english even though there's no test in the near future (ie next few days) ... u'll nv catch me doing such a thing.

but well, having cheered up doesnt mean my lousy results have gone away... it juz makes it more endurable i guess.

pan ate my rotting grapes (she said they tasted like wine) and mr zha ate 2 apples! while i spend my time munching on choc bars n mini pretzels. im so german today!!! =) because i had a freakingly lousy german semestertest. think about it - i didnt even leave early. =( sobs.

oh and mel u're not alone, my comp doesnt love my earphones anymore... they keep blasting e speaker instead. which is irritating bec there'd b lots of noise. grr. n words get really messed up.

okok back to work . tata.

write now!

2007-04-10T23:44:00.000+08:00

write now,

i feel like dying!!!!!!!

CURSE THE HEAVENS AND START WRITING!!!!!!

sehr sian. juz had a deutsch test...

and feeling CRAPPY like the world is crumbling -

and music is blasting downstairs

and my brain is inactive

like mel said INACTIVE.

like one of those unused icons off your desktop.

poop. fish it!

write now!

crappy!

2007-04-10T01:29:00.000+08:00

feeling kinda crappy now cuz i did badly for a lit paper. and im juz feeling crappy la. haha. this is sian. mayb i shld sleep earlier today.. like at 2pm. i need BEAUTY sleep.

I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud
above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past
I just
can't seem to move on

I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need them again someday
I've been setting aside time
to clear a little space in the corners of my mind

All I wanna do is find
a way back into love
I can't make through without a way back into love

I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching
but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's gotta
be something for my soul somewhere

I've been looking for someone to shed
some light
Not somebody just to get me through the night
I could use
some direction and I'm open to your suggestions

All I wanna do is find a
way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping that you'll be there for
me in the end

There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if
anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration not just another negotiation

All I want to do is find a way back into love
I can't make it
through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you I'm
hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you'll help me to start again
You know that I'll be there for you in the end

i love daddy

2007-04-09T15:57:00.000+08:00

i just msged my dad a while ago to say "oh no! i forgot to pay my parking fine. how?"

dad said... "nvm, they will mail another reminder."

and i said, "so shld i go to post office to pay?"

he said "no need dad will handle it"

and i felt really touched!!! may he read this and feel happy. u know my mum always says "you're very fortunate to have such a great father... u'll nv find a father so good anywhere else on earth" because my dad's really v great. he used to change diapers for all of us,.. and wake up in themiddle of the night to feed us..and give us baths when we were babies. and he fetches us to school every morning.. and will fetch me anywhere as long as i ask. and will let me buy anything i please.

(except a new computer, and nobody knows why.)

today mum and dad were cleaning up my room in pgp. and i was lying on e bed exclaiming, "its great to have such wonderful parents!!!!" hahahahahahah.

and dad was playing the guitar and i said "dad ... thank goodness you didnt die that time when u were so sick."

he said "i was going to die meh?"

i said, "yes! u looked so ugly and pathetic!" actually no ididnt say this. i said he looked really (then i demo-ed how he looked by looking pathetic).

and really!

yea lor... that happened end of 2004, when dad fell ill ... and got admitted to intensive care ... and i think that period made me grow up alot, although i cant remember myself being matured in 2005, my j2 year. but well, i guess i grew up la.

hahahahah. anyways, im juz a v thankful girl today. =)

bye!

and yes geckwoon, i do blog almost everyday i realised!!!

and YONGMIN, i didnt know also.. until i went for the easter service... =X

changes

2007-04-09T09:07:00.000+08:00

lately alot of exciting changes in my life! lets update..

i saw two mothers with their daughters.. n i tink i'd love to have a daughter!!! cuz i think v nice the mother-daughter relationship.. and its v special i think.. cuz i think its amaznig to b a mother! so actually even tho i say i dun want children i tink qt nice if i haf to rely on my daughter and she on me ...

what craziness dont u think.

okay anyway mr big the thai music student told me he thinks im matured in my thinking.. and im proud of myself ! cuz even though i speak like a child and i run around the shopping centre playing catching w my brother... and i make stupid comments like "wow i didnt know the moon is so big"... but im actually v matured u know! its all a facade!

i also v proud of myself for growing up.. cuz i think there are alot of things ive come to terms w already. and im v glad about that... =) cuz i think the most impt thing in life is to b at peace with yourself.. that's the closest you can get to happiness.. i suppose. cuz it does apply in whatever situation.

i bought TEN books yesterday. no kidding. guess how much??? 43 bucks! not bad right. first hand, good condition ... at books warehouse sale at expo. its really wonderful! i bought alot of exciting stuff..

VS Naipaul's Magic Seeds
Yann Martel's the facts behind the helsinki roccamatios (this guy wrote life of pi)
.. Rex Shelley's island in the centre (or sth. he's a singaporean writer!)
SIGHTSEEING (by this thai author)
VOICE OF THE VIOLIN (by some italian author)
PEACE KILLS (this funny bk by dunno who)
VILLA sth (another funny bk)
some jap war soldier after the war bk
some bk on japan after ww2
some south african post-apartheid book

since we're at this topic, i also have loads of bks frm e last popular bkfair i've yet to read... stuff like copycat effect... the final century... i like dis kind!! and also more story story kind. i tink i will bring like 3 bks to germany and mug like mad at night when im bored.

ok other than this... we had exco dinner w mr lim that day.. v nice! i love him my parents think he's v cute and looks like mickey mouse.. and i think he ages v gracefully.. cuz he is a contended man... and i think that's what iw anna be when i grow up,.. not to b a MAN of cos. but to b contended with life =)

and i went for expo thing that city harvest thing... pan was dere but dint see her.

ok what else. i bought dis UBER bimbotic wallet.will upload a pic of it soon. ask me to show u if u see me!

okie that's all for now. reading time. =) in pgp already
gosh i miss home!

ok here are some pics for yanner!!! pls upload into yr album these old band pics!

naughty boy

2007-04-08T02:44:00.000+08:00

Naughty boy
You scored 15% masculine, 17% athletic, 9% exotic, and 37% refined!

You like your men with a more boyish look. The huge muscle-popping men don't do it for you as much as the sleeker toned guys. You like the all-American look, but not the squeaky clean type - a little on the bad boy side. Someone like.....Ashton Kutcher. But let's face it, the whole point of this was to look at a bunch of hot guys. If you liked what you saw, please rate my test!

NAUGHTY BOY LEH. REALLY LA!!!!! i really like naughty boys lah. rubbish!!!! hahhahaha very disgusting this test! so many pictures of men!

and what all american la nonsense! i where got like angmoh! other than leonardo dicaprio.

anyway, guess what. is mel ask me to do one . hahaha.

and she also asked me to check out this other blog.. and this girl is like me! worse, she's crazier than me and mel said she loves her. so mel loves me ... cuz bck in daniel days i was v crazy toO! oh my and now i so not act cute anymore. what a saD!

i decided that i shld write proper english.. because if i continue to use singlish ... im afraid i'll nv b able to speak proper english again.

then again, i write so many essays, all in proper english. SO, i think its ok. =)

set. i shall not change.

anyways, im doing research on austria now. i think v scary the place! if i stay in those hostels right v farr from the excitement. n i must fasterly decide which exact places i want to go so i know where to stay

so not that easy! so chim!!!!!!! grrr

2007-04-07T23:46:00.000+08:00

read my 2006 january entries! this is what i wrote when i cried my eyes out and locked myself in my room and had my heart broken:

err... i cant paste it. too bad. its january 29. those terrifyingly long days. what madness i said i will date lizards and ants... what craziness!!! im appalled!! nowonder my room got lizards and ants. all want to date me.

home sweetie home!

2007-04-06T16:03:00.000+08:00

i'm home now! yipee! i love home because got AIRCON u know. wahaha. i gave my daddy my blog to read, and he was reading my 2005 entries! i hate those! i shall remove soon! because they are v kiddy and i hate it! im ashamed of my past! hahaha. anyway, we all sitting in the living room now and my carlin is playing PSP and cleon playing piano!

i love MEL! i promised myself to blog about the two Ms in my life whom i love alot! thank you! they are MICHELLE and MELLISA! hahahha.

ok let's talk about MEL first because i promised her i will blog about her! hahahah. i miss those crazy days leh MEL! i think u're a great girl! i rem how we always study together and discuss alot of hot gossip! i think u really v nice n good! u know i always praise u when i talk to pan. cuz i think u v non-judgmental.. n u v sympathetic and nice. u know! hahahahha. so pls b v touched hor. i miss the time we kept going to cine there and eat that angmoh food and non stop refill the free mushroom soup! i think cuz of us thats why the restaurant must close down! and we also went to esplanade together, not sure if you remember! see the picture below? those were the days!!!!

hahahah... the picture above is so funny, RIGHT!?! hahahaha taken with dear yuhang in those dear JC days. i miss HWACHONG!

i miss MICHELLE too. sorry i pangseh all the time =( actually i really do treasure our friendship. i was looking at those pictures of you in my house.. and i think they are really funnY! and how we always torture ourselves during sleepovers, because we have to complete all the presents ... like for joel's birthday, for band concert... etc. and how we slide down the bed with my brother.. and we play carnival music to pretend that we are in an amusement park! what madness!!!

hahaha... sad feeling v long nv see u! sooon soon!

5 april 2007

2007-04-06T01:58:00.000+08:00

Affiliation with a certain group could be forcing you to question the values you've had for most of your life, Charmaine. This might actually be more disconcerting than it sounds, and thus you might have some thinking to do. Don't discuss this with your friends, as they'll only confuse the issue with their own opinions. Go out on your own, perhaps to a favorite restaurant, and let the ideas flow. You will eventually make sense of it all.

Today's position of the heavenly bodies brings with it the awareness that your current relationship has definite mileage on it. You both suddenly realize that in order to make it the success it could easily be, you will need to do the necessary engine work. Today, though, you can happily enjoy the lighter and more romantic side of your liaison, and strengthen your confidence in each other.